Amish Grace

[Dave]

What does it mean to be a Christian? We are all called differently, however the Amish have always been a Godly witness to me.

I am English (non-Amish) – but was born into an strong Amish community – Shipshewana Indiana
My sister married a ‘Jerked Over” Amish man – meaning he was 100% Amish as all his family until he was 13 years old – when his father left the Amish Church to own a business

My brother-in-law Bob Yoder spoke Dutch, most of his relatives were Amish
He drove the truck – for Bontriger Construction – an Amish crew that would come to your farm – cut your trees down – pass them through and old belt driven saw mill (I worked on that crew for a while stacking slab wood) – then they would build you a post and beam barn.

In my youth, I have driven a car load of Amish into Northern Michigan to hut Mushrooms

In my late 20s I partied very hard. I provided the vehicle for some Amish to go ‘room scrava’ – screwing around. A few girls would come to my house and change clothes to go play with the English. Me and the guys drove around drinking and (whatever)

Story – Jr Barkman – Amish guy, 23 and not married and we worked together. We did a lot of things my daughters are not to know about!

In a stupor – he hit an Amish boy on a bicycle – right in front of the steering wheel
Jr thought it was a mail box – he was intoxicated in more ways than one!
The State arrest Jr – 'vehicle Manslaughter'
The dead boy’s father – and the church elders came to the jail and said
“If Jr settles down, gets married, joins the Amish Church, then it is a good and they will press no charges.”

All Jr had to do was go to Church – be he declined – God’s wrath is greater than mans and in Lagrange County Indiana Jr Barkman served 8000 hours of community service – later he married and joined the church and became a good Christian Amish man

Anyone else would have said – sure I’ll go to church to get out of trouble
But to Jr – it was a serious line he was not ready to cross

Nothing but respect – true story

2006 – a gunman walks into an Amish school house and shoots 10 Amish school girls
I was working In Salida, Colorado at the time and everyone asked me – what will the Amish do?
I told them then – the Amish will attend the gunman’s funeral

This is a true story of how a small group of Amish Christian witness to the entire world

Make some popcorn – grab a pillow – curl up with your wife and watch this ’Christian Movie’
It is YouTube – and the easiest of bandwidths

Amish Grace
youtu.be/KFwIQ2q9ZYw

1 hr 29 min
“When a gunman killed five Amish children and injured five others in a Nickel Mines, Pennsylvania schoolhouse shooting in October of 2006, the world media attention rapidly turned from the tragic events to the extraordinary forgiveness demonstrated by the Amish community. Through the eyes of a grieving mother, Ida Graber, and other devastated families, this movie explores the Amish's astonishing reaction to the horrific shootings - of forgiveness and compassion.”

Nothing but respect – true story

[Dillon]

As I watch this all I could think of was Eric. It has been 15 years and I still am not sure if I have fully forgiven. These Amish were fortunate enough to know who to blame. Our grief destroyed our family. I have never thought of forgiving myself for the harm my selfishness cause my family. I have tried my best to stay in contact with Jill, but even that is a reminder of what was lost.

15 years later and I still feel the guilt of not understanding what was happening. Should I have done more? Could I have done more? To think Eric is at home with God is reassuring, but the guilt of being the survivor is hard to bear.

Jill sends her love and says if you guys need a hotel she would love to have you.

[Dave]

Growing up around the Amish was quiet and education. There were many in my elementary school until the 6th grade – after that they went to their own school and graduated a year later. You do not need a high school diploma to be Amish, or to work with your hands. I have helped thrash – us guys were just shoveling one pile to another – before and after.

I have help pull corn – 5yr old Jr drives the wagon (actually the horse kept pace with the Dad) – the shortest child is in the row next to the wagon – taller in the next row – and tallest (Dad) several rows from the wagon. Each pulling ears of corn and tossing them into the wagon. It is embarrassing to be so far behind the children come to help you!

I have several Amish stories for ya – the Story of Alvin Miller is a good one

Alvin kept his cigarettes in the glove compartment of this drivers car – puff all the wat to work – at work – and all the way home. Alvin would come to my house to change clothes – so his buddy could take him to a strip club in South Bend, Indiana. He also had 2 PKU children, Wilber and Martha. Wilber was/is a nice guy – he is not bright enough to be anything else – and Martha was the buss Girl/Dishwasher at the Das Duchmen Essenhaus – for as long as I knew her.

How do the Amish pick a new Bishop (leader)
They place a card into a hymnal – the little children gather them and store them away in the Church wagon – two weeks later at the next service – the little children again pass out the hymnals. Guess who got the card – Alvin.

All of us that knew him though him to be the last choice possible
A Few months later Alvin would not even talk to us
If you are put on the spot preaching it – it is hard not to live it
Alvin turned his life around- stupid Amish

Tell Jill we all say Hi – and if we do go to Chicago – Oklahoma would be the wrong direction. But it might be worth it just to drive around in her Tesla

Question for you - I have always wanted to ask, but havent
You speak of not knowing who to blame
Was the loss of eric made worse as we left Iraq unfinished / unaccomplished

I ask because of what is happening in Afghanistan
Mothers are asking - why did my son die there - if we were just going to let the Teliban have it in the end?

[Dillon]

Well Dave it is like this. I held my anger for many years, but it is difficult when you are not sure who to blame. Eric chose to serve his fellow man and his country and it cost him his life. He didn’t die a useless death from a car accident or disease, but died serving his comrades.

Do I relive the pain whenever I see what Iraq is today? Yes but I chose to be proud that he died for his country. Would it have been different if we left Iraq sooner, I cannot say. Most of my real anger was never at the country or Bush, but within myself, thinking I should have not let him go. We get angry over all types of stuff. Like Ida Grader wanting to leave the Amish because of one photo. Little things insite your anger. If only Eric was here to see this or share in that.

Just like your movie, I choose to think his life served a purpose and his death, so it was not a waste. It only took me years to find that peace.

[Dave]

Nothing but respect

I was busy with my career – working a zillion hours taking extra classes – and the next thing I knew it had been 6 years since I last saw my father, then he passed away.

He was 87. I did not grieve for his demise, but that I had not taken the time to visit him.

Survivor’s guilt!

My father was a truck driver and never home – then I went away to school – once he retired he moved to Arizona and I took an extra job in Chicago to work on my master’s degree.

Cats in the Cradle - Harry Chapin

My child arrived just the other day
He came to the world in the usual way
But there were planes to catch, and bills to pay
He learned to walk while I was away
And he was talking 'fore I knew it, and as he grew
He'd say "I'm gonna be like you, dad"
"You know I'm gonna be like you"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you coming home, dad?" "I don't know when"
But we'll get together then
You know we'll have a good time then

My son turned ten just the other day
He said, thanks for the ball, dad, come on let's play
Can you teach me to throw, I said-a, not today
I got a lot to do, he said, that's okay
And he, he walked away, but his smile never dimmed
It said, I'm gonna be like him, yeah
You know I'm gonna be like him

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you coming home, dad?" "I don't know when"
But we'll get together then
You know we'll have a good time then

Well, he came from college just the other day
So much like a man I just had to say
Son, I'm proud of you, can you sit for a while?
He shook his head, and they said with a smile
What I'd really like, dad, is to borrow the car keys
See you later, can I have them please?

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you coming home, son?" "I don't know when"
But we'll get together then, dad
You know we'll have a good time then

I've long since retired, my son's moved away
I called him up just the other day
I said, I'd like to see you if you don't mind
He said, I'd love to, dad, if I can find the time
You see, my new job's a hassle, and the kids have the flu
But it's sure nice talking to you, dad
It's been sure nice talking to you

And as I hung up the phone, it occurred to me
He'd grown up just like me
My boy was just like me

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you coming home, son?" "I don't know when"
But we'll get together then, dad
We're gonna have a good time then